How Do Teenage Problems Affect The Parents?
Julia and I have a fair share of challenges when our two children grew to become teenagers. Suddenly they no longer looked at their parents as heros, they also found it hard to relate to us as buddies. When they faced some real stressful and challenging situations in relationships – To share or not to share? That’s the big question.
As parents, we have to understand that teenage problems are inherent because of having to cope with everyday issues from school to the home front. How teens cope with these issues will determine whether or not the parents can be part of the solution. With the complications of stress within our daily lives the situation could lead to alcoholism or even more to the extreme cases that leads to pregnancy in daughters.
These subjects will be mentioned in this article and how open communication can help teenagers cope with problems and how they affect the parents.
Teenagers experience stress just as much as adults do
Let’s talk about the stress issues that seem to be commonplace with teenagers these days. Even if teenagers are self sufficient and confident about life, there is a lot to learn. Stress is the precursor to learning what to do and the parents can be the safety valve that will help their teenagers cope.
No one can expect a 15 year old to know what to do about the social challenges that the world gives at that point. But yet, teenagers are bombarded with social questions all the time. They are aware of these situations and stress out under the best of conditions. If teenagers are stifled of their independence, then the parents will suffer.
Parents need to learn right along with their children, that in order to make them grow up properly to withstand the social pressures of life, communication is important. Let them try different approaches to solving problems. Give them guidance and let them find out what happens with their choices.
Spiritual guidance is another key
Communication is good but I found out that it is just not enough. Julia and I have to spend enough time to talk to our teenagers about how they could depend on God for the ultimate help. Parents are here for them when they face issues. However, parents cannot be with them as and when things happen, the ever presence and loving God is there for them whenever they call upon Him.
Escapism is where teenagers turn to when parents are not helping
If parents don’t help their kids out, then that’s one of the reasons they turn to drugs or alcohol. This avenue of escape means exactly that – an escape from reality so that they don’t have to face the stresses because they don’t know the answer. If parents don’t help by giving a guiding hand or offer suggestions, then teenagers will resort to escapism.
This escapism can sometimes lead to pregnancy in teenage daughters because they see no way out of the situation. Teenage daughters are looking for consideration and an open ear for their concerns. If they don’t get it from their parents, they’ll get it from their peer group.
Teenagers aren’t considered children and they aren’t considered adults. They are in a very vulnerable stage in life where if they don’t get the proper direction they may go down the wrong road. Pregnancy in teens can happen because they think they have nowhere else to go for intimacy and understanding.
Parents need to be aware of this fact and need to help their children become independent so that they can lead a fulfilling life.
My two teenage children have grown to their twenties now. They have different sets of challenges. Julia and I are eternally grateful that we could continue trusting God for His grace and strength to see both the parents and our children through. We made the commitment to be parents who are available when they want to talk things through. How about you? We are sure that as we open up ourselves, including our vulnerability, to the children, they will also be open to us. Happy parenting!